Afraid To Fail

I am at the point in my life again, where I feel like I'm not good enough. These past few days have been hard, I have not wanted to do anything. I sometimes forget how strong I really am, how I used to stand when the waves were trying to pull me under. I'm so different than how I used to be, now I've hit the bottom of the ocean and am looking back on the happiness I used to have. All I am is a light in the darkness, I've been struggling to stand up when everyone is trying to push me down underneath the waves. I used to just let them too. I let them kick me around and pull me under. I didn't have the will to fight. I realize that I was wrong. That was never what I wanted. I never wanted to feel useless and hurt. I wanted to stand and be strong. My father had always raised me to be a fighter. I slowly started to remember how much I had changed. I wanted to be a strong person like my mother and father. I remember how strongly I used to fight for what I believed in, but lately I had become so wrapped up in myself and how I felt sorry for myself. It was all my fault where I was in my life. And that was they day I woke up. I realized that my life wasn't going to magically fix itself, I needed to step up and work on my life. That day I got home and decided my life was unorganized, so I cleaned my entire room and organized it. I decided I was overweight, I signed up for volleyball, softball, and basketball. I decided that I had become lazy, I helped my mom whenever she needed it. I decided I had become lazy in school as well and I knew I was better than that, I signed for ASB (Associated Student Body) and Drama. I decided that the insults I had been recieving and people treating me badly was unacceptable, I stood up to them and stood up for myself. I CHANGED. I changed because no one else could help me if I couldn't help myself. That's when I decided it was time for a new revolution. Not of hate, but of loving yourself for who you are. It is time to raise your voice and join the rebellion.

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